


The Ultimate Cyclops/Wolverine PWP

by Badficwriter (Lamashtar)



Category: Marvel, Marvel (Comics), Marvel 616, X-Men (Comicverse), X-Men (Movies), X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Innuendo, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Sexual Humor, Sillyfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-12-21
Updated: 2002-12-21
Packaged: 2018-04-22 20:31:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4849514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lamashtar/pseuds/Badficwriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A hypothetical.  What would make two straight super-heroes have consensual sex together? </p><p>Author apology: it all takes place off-camera.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Ultimate Cyclops/Wolverine PWP

"The only way we can save the world is by havin' sex!?"

"That's what Reed Richards says."

"Where do these guys get their ideas?"

"How the heck should I know, Wolverine?"

"Well, why the heck do WE have to have sex? Why can't they get somebody-hell, ANYBODY-else?"

"Richards said it has to do with the two of us being cosmic avatars and the polar nexus needing universal archetypes to come together."

"He's gotta be yankin' your chain."

"Did you think I wouldn't have Jean mindscan him? She confirmed that he's telling the truth."

"Of all the lousy...!"

"I'm not wild about this either, Logan!"

"Let's just get this over with."

"What the hell do you think you're doing?! Back off, mister!"

"Come on, Cyke, everyone knows you're a pansy."

"Bite me, shorty! YOU have a healing factor. And you've been a pain in MY ass since the beginning!"

"Screw YOU, Summers! Wolverine don't bend over for nobody!"

"Afraid, little man? Big, bad Wolverine can't take it?"

"You wanna make somethin' of it, bub?"

"Dammit, Logan, we don't have time for this! We've only got 10 minutes before the entire world is destroyed!"

"I can take whatever you can dish out, Summers. But I guess we all can't have healing factors. 'Course, if you were MAN enough to take one for the team..."

"Just hurry up and get your pants off. What are you doing NOW?"

"Hold yer horses. I'm lookin' for some lubricant."

"I thought you were the one with the healing factor."

"You keep talkin', we can still switch places."

"..."

 

And so...

"Am I hurting you?"

"You start already?"

"Oh, shut up."

"I ain't made o' glass, Summers, you can go faster than that."

"Less help, please."

"Any time this week, pal."

"You're breaking my concentration, runt."

"Speakin' o'which..."

"You want this to take longer?"

"..."

 

A few minutes later.

"'Bout time."

"...Logan."

"So that's it!? The X-men save the whole flamin' world again and nobody knows?"

"Richards knows. Besides, this isn't the kind of mission you boast about. Would you really want all those other superheroes to know you saved the world by having sex with a man?"

"Nah. I'll just tell 'em all YOU did."

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to Ann Marie for the encouragement and Blueprint for the remark that got me to wondering 'just when would they do it in character?'
> 
> Reposted to A3O from Fanfiction.net


End file.
